He was in the hospital for two months and passed away at 39. We were together for twenty-five years. I lost my husband in the morning of March 20, 2017. I also know that he would want nothing more than for me to be happy because that's how he lived his life every day. You are just beginning this journey of healing. I don't know how I'm going to go on without him. He passed away on 17 October 2021. He was our center, our life evolved around him. Now I feel so lonely and lost. I was 59. Many trips to Iowa City to see the liver doctor. The saddest moment is when the person who gave you the best memories, becomes a memory Remembering you is easy, I do it every day. My heart was crushed! I am still grieving. Charlene Valladares, Where Are You? All other content on this website is Copyright 2006-2023 FFP Inc. All rights reserved. It would have been our 13th anniversary on Sept 9th. He is with me always as he'd promised me faithfully he would be. wanting you and needing you. He did so much for all of us, He was always helping people. Nothing can prepare you for the heartache of losing someone you love. I don't even know how to feel. Even though they worked effortlessly, they did get his heart started with lots of medication. The one that will be on our side no matter what happens. I bid you peace. Her family all going well into their 70s and 80s while she got screwed at 62 years! The loneliness surrounds me; This is the third anniversary that he has been absent. Eventually we ended up in the hospital. But even if you do not have children, you were left on this earth for a purpose - you have unique gifts that the rest of the world needs. I just read the submission From Lat, CA. He died 48 hours later from a PE. He wasn't the type to lay in bed or stay down. I miss him so much. He didn't smoke but worked with chemicals and not a very good work environment. Missing your lover poems It feels so lonely without you, Without you I feel so blue Your presence made me smile Your habits irked me, But those were the cute moments I remember to thee Please come back soon I miss you a lot! I'm not ok - but it's normal - normal to feel empty, sad, alone in a crowd, angry, guilty, abandoned, loved, left, different, impatient and no idea who you are or what you like as a single person. I miss his little jokes and all our trips in our camper van, and I wish I could join him. The only reason this sticks in my mind as I was just looking at my retirement money and what I can do for early retirement and I saw that dependent children and spouses can get their husband's retirement from federal. Now I'm lost. I wanted to go with him and sometimes still do, just to see him and touch him again. I lost my wife 22 years ago. He was my world and my friend. I am a 60-year-old woman, and like you, living alone. I still miss him and still wish it could've been me. There are no time tables for how long you are supposed to grieve. I feel totally lost, hurt and sad. If not to benefit from it now maybe an early retirement age for full retirement. I held his hand and said "Let's make a pact right here right now that I will never lose you and you will never lose me". Can't stop crying. He fell at home and I rushed him to the ER. . He was killed one house down in my neighbor's yard on March 13th of this year trying to prevent an argument between two of our neighbors from escalating into gunfire and was shot from behind. It's says everything in my heart ..and more!! My heart's completely broken. Thank you. My God knows how much I cry for him. My life is so empty now. I'm on SSI and disability, and he had no life insurance, so it's gonna be hard to move on moneywise. Then at the point they could do no more. We were so poor but yet rich with love. I lost my John on 18 December 2008. I miss him a lot. He was not my husband - very weak, frail, his emotional state was very bad. Motorcycle accident. We also have a daughter who still lives with me and I am so thankful for her. He had battled different health issues since 2008. .. love is eternal. I sit alone now in the darkness of despair. And I am also tired of people telling me stop crying. If we weren't on our bikes we would ride the bus or light rail. He was so easy to talk to because we were going through the same thing. Just waiting for God to call me to be with my love again. All of our husbands would want us to be happy in our lives. I lost my husband of 41 years December 27 th 2015. He was diagnosed in July 2015 with Stage 4 Metastatic Colon Cancer and lived for 20 months. I think he knew. Some minutes I just don't know how I am going to do this. I am still in great grief. I will missing him forever. I lost my husband of 33 1/2 years of marriage. I still can't believe he is gone. Death is inevitable, I know. We did it, we did it, we would say. Grief And Loneliness After Losing A Spouse I sit alone now in the darkness of despair. I lost my husband almost a year ago to the date, June 23, 2019. Our 3 adult children, all in their 20s, had no idea how to help me as they were grieving too, so it was agreed I would go to counseling to help me through this horrible time. Thanks for your poem! I need to talk about my husband with someone who listens without judgement of how much I miss him. for I no longer exist there. My life hard with out him. I am better than I used to be. My chest is so hollow and my heart skips beats daily!!! There are no words to explain the loneliness. He would have been 47, and in a few days it's our 27th wedding anniversary. God is not done with me yet. There is no one to talk to. And he fought to the very end. There are reminders everywhere. But for whatever reason we had his birthday dinner the night before. I FEEL his presence and know this is coming from my heart. Everyone says I can do it and be strong, but I am weak. Cherish all the memories you had together. 12 yearsI can only imagine the pain and hurt. Thank you to all my sisters in this agony of pain for your sharing. My husband passed away almost 3 months ago at the age of 26, because people on the road do not know how to drive. He was most of my life, so now I am just this empty shell. In March 2021 we had been told he has secondary stage 4 bone cancer which we were not told about the primary cancer. 24-hour care every day with Hospice nurses. I am so sorry for your loss. He had been battling cancer for three years. Holding onto hope every step. But I do try to keep my head to God and have faith that he will see us through!!! You will go on - as days and nights still continue to come and go. Blessed be the Lord. Lots of people, lots of advice, lots of choices, but in the end whatever you do will be the right thing for that time. I'm so used to depending on him. I just wish you will always stay. Sorry for your loss. I lost the love of my life, my soulmate, my best friend, lover, protector, caretaker and father to our two beautiful amazing daughters on February 5, 2019. Blessings to all. I cry almost every day. I lost my husband on February 1st, 2017. We were devastated and still grieve his loss every day! Cry all you want. He was my one and only. I know he would want me to not get stuck in grief, but I constantly see him vividly on the day he suffered cardiac arrest in the dialysis center with no one helping him. We met in high school. I just have to know if I will survive. Very similar as my wife lost her short battle with lung/brain cancer August 9, 2018. As time went on, he did not complain of any pain. I need desperately to be in a good place for my babies. I can't get through a day without crying my eyes out. That will never happen, I am so in love with my husband and don't ever want that to change. I promised him I would learn to be happy, and this is what I am focusing on. I tell him every day that I love him and I miss him. I'm so angry, so alone and will never forget seeing my Ken, laying there and not able to save him. We met when I was sixteen and were together our entire adult lives, 32 years. He lingered 11 days on life support. The photo of the woman with her hand on her husband's pillow, at the beginning of this page, looks like me every night and morning. My heart is broken into a million tiny pieces. He never made it home. This was my best friend. I have to pretend to be happy every day, pretend to be 'normal' whatever that is anymore. I had been taking care of him more than 10 years. My grandson has my husband's eyes bluish grey beautiful. Kill yourself when you are depressed? I look forward to joining him one day! He did everything for me. Don't know how I am supposed to live without him. I was there with family, in shock. The last year we were together every day. Missing You Kathy Murphy more by Kathy Murphy Published by Family Friend Poems May 2011 with permission of the author. What you have experienced is awful. I miss you when your gone away. In December John became confused and disoriented. I dread being alone. But your post was beautiful and a positive way to look at each day. He was so excited to be a grandfather, that every time I leave my now grandkids, I cry because I know what he is missing and it breaks my heart. I still feel alone sometimes. Michael molded a handprint statute of their hands together and crying tonight with Michael on the phone and said, "I still can't believe your father is gone." It's not the easiest thing, but I am determined that I will live and not die. I lost my husband 2 years ago after nearly 50 years of marriage. We were over the moon happy to get to find love again. I lost my husband in August 2017, and we have a 14 year old. He also had "restless leg syndrome," but the hospital said it was federal law that they could not leave all bed rails up. I control what happens every day of the week so that I am not alone because the loneliness without my husband breaks me. I never even got to give him his birthday card. Share your final wishes, just in case. I lost my husband, soulmate, and best friend nearly three years ago very suddenly. It will take a long time before anything will come about. We never were able to have children. We have two children. Now what do I do? I'm lost, angry, depressed, scared, you name it. today even if it's just for the day. My wife died 12 years ago. But it's a different kind of sad now. I still and always will wear my wedding ring on the correct hand. Exactly how so many feel! Massive heart attack. Just please know you're not alone and I'll be sending love and prayers to you. Now it's just a lonely hell. I feel lost, broken, sad, mad, confused, alone, guilty, weak, like I have no control. I knew from the moment he introduced himself on our first date, that this was the man I was going to marry. I still miss him more than ever. We lost him at the tender age 47 due to a heart attack. I feel so very sad, and I miss him every second of the day. We experienced all of the for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health before I miss my husband so much. Life will never be the same. I know the despair. I have lost the will to live and was sent home from the hospital and wasn't with him when he passed away. Yes, I have 4 older grown up children and grandchildren, but still I am alone. Oh hell, where and how can I move on? He wasn't feeling well before we went to Florida and I said, "Do you think we should go." But I think no matter whether you have a large circle of friends or not, no one can understand the loss unless they have experienced it. These messages of love are making me appreciate my loving husband more, and for that I thank ALL of you! We began dating and married in October 2007. It has been 5 months and 14 days since I have seen his beautiful face, but yet it feels like yesterday that I saw his beautiful face. We have two small children together. I didn't want to leave the sceneand when I came home I had to tell my 3 older kids from my 1st husband whom died in a tree accident 6 years prior and our 9 year old son he will never see his dad again. I didn't have my husband, so I would go to him. I have changed for I, too, died when she did. He died at home with me and our youngest daughter at his side. We had been married for 47 years. For My Husband Loving you has no end and no beginning Loving you is everything It is infinite in time And limitless in magnitude Beyond even my own comprehension Your love brings me home Enfolds me and warms me In its eternal embrace R.I.P. We were married for 34 years. He took care of me when I needed things, he took care of me when I was ill, then it was my turn to do in return for him. Until then, I know he would have been proud of my strength. I miss him so much. Every day is hard for me. It never goes away. On January 21, 2019, I awoke to my husband breathing very rapidly. I felt like screaming and could not believe what I heard. I cry constantly, and the pain is like someone just turned my stomach inside out and ripped my heart out. We have a 21 year old daughter. When I miss you too much. I don't know how to do this. My love, my sweetheart. I don't even know if I am coming or going. I still don't feel single, and I feel like he is at my side. Until I am united with him once more, I will go on with my life as best as I can. We met in Europe. After calming him down and getting a nurse, I asked why does he not have bed rails? The only thing that gives me a little comfort is when people reach out to give me a hug or when they are willing to listen to me when I need to talk or cry. Sometimes I feel I'm Okay but no, I'm still in pain. He had gotten up to sit in his recliner, and I was still sleeping. My head is so messed up from all of this. I came here today because I was looking for him. I feel I have nothing left and wish I could join them. Our daughter was pregnant with our first grandchild and my husband died 2 1/2 months before he was born. Although we do not have any mutual child together, we had unconditional love for one another. With one year until retirement, on June 18, 2015, my wife was diagnosed with ALS. I have lost husband, friend, and lover. We spent 26 years together and we had 6 kids. I know he wouldn't mind because he was very open, but I always say it is morally inappropriate, and I am so involved with my daughter's bipolar and anxiety that I do not have the strength to even think of anyone else. I pray for God to take me so I can be with him. I'm so heartbroken. He was the only man who ever told me I was beautiful and daily told me I was, "cute times 10!". I am not sure that is true. He was 53 years old. Our children needed him, I needed him, all we have is each other. He was my world, my everything, my best friend, my lover, my soulmate. We were out having drinks with friends and decided to go back to their place. How the hell can you say that? I lost my husband of 13 years suddenly on March 15, 2019. He was my rock, my best friend. He was my rock, soul, and best friend. I do have a great support team, but it just doesn't seem right. My husband was diagnosed with lung cancer on Valentine's Day. I am trying to fill my time with what has to be done, but I fell like I am just passing time. We are raising three of our grandchildren. 12 years is a long time to grieve. It was always as I would tell everyone my proudest achievement as we hit another anniversary. I lost my reason to live on June 12, 2017 and just flat out do not want to go on without him. He never was responsive after the surgery. Just miss him. It's the kind of heartache you can feel in your bones. I miss him so much, and I cannot come to terms with his death. You are so right about grieving. At home, if I am not crying and turning into a puddle, I'm numb. I can't seem to move past why this happened to such a beautiful soul. This has been so difficult. I just can't comprehend what happened. Many adjustments ahead. I still cry a lot for my husband. I function and get through the day, but I am sad to the bones. I do still feel truly empty, lost, and I can't stop my tears in the public or with my friends. He was 33 years old and would have been 34 in April. Our 30 year marriage was a wonderful one. As a single mom, I tell you and every widow out there to be strong and have faith. I know too well that he's never coming back. I miss him so much. God bless all of you who are suffering a loss of a loved one. It's so hard trying to wrap my brain around him not being here. I miss him so much, Can't fall asleep, night are the worst. Now I'm shattered and wondering if God was laughing at me. My son was the one who found his dad. I keep trying to get my life together{ Other peoples words not my own}. I will never forget him he was the love of my life and I adored him. I lost my husband of almost 25 years on 2/12/19. I miss everything about him. I found him gone in his sleep Sunday. The saying "If one hadn't loved so deeply one would not grieve" gives me comfort in my grief. A widow friend shared a quote I believe is from Dickens. My husband passed on November 12, 2017, and your words are my life right now. While he was signing in to see him, he collapsed and died. I lost my husband at 47. Thank you for sharing this, Carol. He passed at 71, and I'm only 49. I lay here in the dark for hours staring at the ceiling. I am reading these messages today because we lost a dear friend to cancer, and he has left behind a wife and young son. He took care of me as I have chronic pain due to a back injury. Having to live without my husband who I adored, cherished and loved so much, I hurt beyond hurt. Some say you will get over it, well if you haven't lost a loved one close to you, you will never get over it. I know God is near, and I continually pray to feel his presence to get me through step by step.
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